Collar Shopping

So back in July my Sir gave me a collar. It was designed to be a play collar since it came from Petco. It was leather and awesome! I am also highly allergic to it apparently. So much so that I went to work the next day with a red rash around my neck, that was rather icky. So we decided after some discussion of what it would mean or not mean, that he wanted me to have an everyday collar. In the past few months we have been looking for a collar with a ever-growing frequency and sense of frenzy.

Well, finding the perfect collar for everyday wear is proving to be a *very* difficult proposition. I guess I should not be surprised by this fact. We always hear that “things worth having are worth waiting for” and that thing are not always easy.

With my Sir and I, there is a very, very rocky history there. A lot of bad stuff and bad ju-ju. When I consider this, it is actually very fitting that the collar search has come about in this manner.

The first thing that seems fitting to how our relationship is unique is how long we have been together to get to this point. It has been over three years since we started on this journey. Three years. And this is not a collaring. It is just getting a collar to signify the relationship we have. There is going to be no change in our relationship, no referring to me as owned or property or slave. And no change in how he and I interact. That is fine with me- our relationship has a LOT of power exchange in it already and while more is always welcomed, it works out better for us if we both want the change and it comes about organically. We also slowly add new power issues. Again it seems to make things go smoother.

I know many people who are collared within days or weeks or even months. This in some ways always made me mad or envious. Mad because I didn’t see how things got that serious that quickly and envious because I wanted the same thing for myself. Another item I noticed in this is the age of the people involved. Where there are hasty collarings that end unsuccessfully (as many that I observed have) there are usually younger people involved with it. Now there are some exceptions to this and this is just personal observations. But it made me think a bit. When I started with my Sir, it was over three years ago and I was very immature and young for my age. I have had a great deal of time to learn and grow. I think that has been very good for us as well. I am not as naïve or blindly jumping into things I would have years ago.

I think that the sometimes frustrating search for this collar is rather fitting for us and how things have evolved between us. Having had this revelation is making me much calmer about the search and re-affirmed that things will happen when it is right. And having seen at this point hundreds of options for possible collars, we will be all the happier when we find the one that speaks to us.